Empty as a pocket...
... Where is that money tree hiding? Do not get me wrong, it is not that I lust after wealth. My childhood was penniless and I was the happiest most fulfilled little mancub you could imagine. Although it is possible to use this idea, as well as the well documented truth that money in excess can distract a believer from a pure dependent relationship with the Heavenly Father (camels and needle eyes....), to argue that money should not be a matter of concern is erroneous (utter bunk).
I am in a bit of a dilemma, I could keep following my dream, and cling to the hope that I get the £££ to take my MA or i can give up on the idea settling for a 'proper long-term job' this stifels my creativity and passion, but pays the bills. God gives us dreams and hope, but, however, He is also the source of wisdom. Wisdom to put dreams on hold?
So yes, 'blue' is what I am feeling. However I have a sneaky feeling that I will look back over this time and not see the frustration, but, only see what I learned throgh the experience- how to maintain a marriage amid stressful conditions; how to be inventive with potatoes and rice; how to gain Kelli's forgiveness (for not coming to her wedding); how to save busfare by hurtling into town on a pedal-less bike or how truly empathise and not to romanticise the lives of poor people (who's stories I eventually want to communicate through theatre).
Who knows what the future holds, And I for one need to settle my teetering nerves with a few 'trust' sandwiches, and a cup of 'count thy blessings' tea. No matter what happens, one thing is for certain: I have the world's Grooviest Gran.
Here is a picture of her in her Ronaldinho mask that she wears while watching the World Cup. She has a small 'sympathy' crush on him (..."well, someone has to", she insists.)
She gave my cousin the fright of his life when she answered the door with it on! 'Grannybug', or 'The Queen', as I call her, has a wicked sense of humor and prooves that life over 80 can be fun. She always taught me to say 'I am who I am, and I don't give a damn.'
Here she is keeping law and order in my cousin's hat. Yes, I am proud to be named after her (middle name = Sheila).
posted by Bethybu @ 1:02 PM
3 Comments:
*a little prayer that you're sent a miracle and can do your MA....*
bluelikethat
Beth, its always right to pursue the dreams that God has placed within you. Timing is of course another thing that you have to learn as you go, but I'm sure he will provide if the timing is right. Sometimes he brings us right to the end of ourselves, to the last minute, before "showing up" with the answer. Your Grandma is hilarious! I'm sure that Dom will be rejoicing today! Well done on your marks, Miss Academia! I am thinking about you at least once an hour at the moment being back at Thetis. We need to come back here together sometime! Lots of love xoxox
Beth my dear,
I've just got home from a roadtrip out to Kelowna for Melissa Rose Hallman (formerly White)'s wedding. It was lovely, despite the fact that the only person I knew other than the beautiful bride was Kyle the cameraman Turner. Nathan came with me, and it was good to see how we weathered our first road trip together, and we stayed with Miss Laura, which was a blast. She is such an awesome girl. We talked about you and missed you! Oh my friend, I just think that you are great, and that you should keep your head up and not worry about that money. I am wondering whether there would be the opportunity for you to do the same degree in Canada (presuming you move out here in a year or two) or if this is something specific to your University... Also, what's the deal with student loans? In any case, much love, and of course it is always much easier to believe that God has wonderful plans for others than for ourselves. So if you are struggling with keeping that confidence, you can at least know that I am over here keeping that confidence for you!!!
Much much love, and I am still hoping to maybe see you this summer? Or am I meant to understand that you aren't going to be able to make the trip out this year? -sorry. I didn't think of that til just now. I'm not going to make it down for Kelli's wedding either...
Okay. hugs and kisses.
Ashley Star.
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